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Articles

Darwin Awards - Part 1/3

These awards are given each year to bestow upon (the remains of) that individual(s), who through single-minded self-sacrifice, has done the most to remove undesirable elements (himself) from the human gene pool.

5th RUNNER-UP
Goes to a San Anselmo, CA man who died when he hit a lift tower at the Mammoth Mountain ski area while riding down the slope on a foam pad. The 22-year old David Hubal was pronounced dead at Central Mammoth Hospital. "The accident occurred about 3a.m.," the Mono County Sheriff's department said. "Hubal and his friends apparently had hiked up a ski run called Stump Alley and undid some yellow foam protectors from lift towers," said Lt. Mike Donnelly of the Mammoth Lakes Police Department. "The pads are used to protect skiers who might hit towers. The group apparently used the pads to slide down the ski slope and Hubal crashed into a tower. It has since been investigated and determined the tower he hit was the one with its pads removed."

4th RUNNER-UP
Goes to Robert Pueo, 32, who was apparently being disorderly in a St. Louis market. When the clerk threatened to call the police, Puelo grabbed a hot dog, shoved it into his mouth and walked out without paying. Police found him unconscious in front of the store. Paramedics removed the six-inch wiener from his throat - it had choked him to death.

3rd RUNNER-UP
Goes to poacher Marino Malerba of Spain, who shot a stag standing above him on an overhanging rock and was killed instantly when it fell on him.

2nd RUNNER-UP
"Man loses face at party."A man at a West Virginia party(probably related to the winner last year, a man in Arkansas who used the 22 bullet to replace the fuse in his pickup truck) popped a blasting cap into his mouth and bit down, triggering an explosion that blew off his lips, teeth, and tongue. Jerry Stromyer, 24, of Kincaid, bit the blasting cap as a prank during the party late Tuesday night, said Capt. M. D. Payne. "Another man had it in an aquarium hooked to a battery and was trying to explode it. It wouldnt go off and this guy said 'I'll show you how to set it off.

Continued - Part 2

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